Mother of Necessity

because sometimes, you just have to.

What is Stealing Your Happiness?

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Happy

We all desire to be happy. We all struggle to become happier or to maintain our happy. For some, it’s easy to maintain their happiness, and that is fantastic. For the rest of us we sometimes struggle with this on a yearly/monthly/daily basis.

Here are 6 areas that I have come up with that may steal your happiness.

1.  Your perception: Is your perception of your life stealing your happiness? Focusing on the negative things can change your perspective and make you feel sad.

It’s a simple fix. Change your perception: focus on the positives or the good things. I know, easier said than done. It is that simple, it just takes some practice. Every time you are negative or feeling negative, think about what is positive too. Don’t dwell on the negative…..move on.

2.  The weather: Does the cold, snowy weather have you feeling yucky? A lot of us are feeling it this year. Don’t let the cold and snow steal your joy. Punch it right in the face and say to yourself: this is a good day and I am going to be happy in spite of this awful weather. Enjoy the weather instead of cursing it. It could be worse, but you are fortunate enough to have shelter, heat, food and the strength to shovel snow or the finances to pay someone to shovel for you. Remember, this is only a season and it too shall pass.

Having a positive attitude can change your day quickly. Do something fun, like: go sledding, build a snowman, have a shoveling party or take a brisk walk and enjoy being outside.

3.  Your health: Is your health stealing your happiness? It probably is, being sick will steal your happiness. I know there are days when it’s impossible to be happy when you are so sick. But on a good day or even a not so great day they have joy in their heart. No pity parties here, just gratefulness brings happiness.

All the books say, being happy can help with recovery and prolong your life. I think it’s a good practice for all of us to find our happy. Even if it’s the smallest thing like a great conversation with a friend or waking up to another day. We need to see that those acts are things that make us happy and we need to cling to those. Some of us may not have the opportunity for another conversation or one more day.

I have some friends that are very sick and their health would be a great excuse for them to be unhappy/grumpy/mad at the world. But they are not. I am amazed by my friends. Even when they are having a very bad day, they say they are great and couldn’t ask for anything more and say it with a heartfelt smile on their face.

I know there are days when it’s impossible to be happy when you are so sick. But on a good day or even a not so great day they have joy in their heart.

All the books say, being happy can help with recovery and prolong your life. I think it’s a good practice for all of us to find our happy. Even if it’s the smallest thing like a great conversation with a friend or waking up to another day. We need to see that those acts are things that make us happy and we need to cling to those. Some of us may not have the opportunity for another conversation or one more day.

No pity parties here, just gratefulness brings happiness.

4.  Guilt: Does past or current guilt keep you from being happy? I’m talking about emotional guilt we carry because we did/said something we shouldn’t have. In my opinion, there’s only 2 ways to deal with emotional guilt. The second is, if the guilt you carry is something that is out of your control to correct, then the only option left is to…..let it go. Just like the song says in the movie Frozen, Let it Go, Let it Go. Don’t hold on to something you cannot correct. It’s a waste of your time and it steals your happiness. It’s time to move on.

The first is, if it’s something you can fix, then I suggest fixing it. If you have the courage to step up and admit what you did/said was wrong, then do it. Make it happen. Put on your big boy/girl pants and fix it. I know that’s some tough love but it’s very true. We are the only ones that can help ourselves be happy.

The second is, if the guilt you carry is something that is out of your control to correct, then the only option left is to…..let it go. Just like the song says in the movie Frozen, Let it Go, Let it Go. Don’t hold on to something you cannot correct. It’s a waste of your time and it steals your happiness. It’s time to move on.

5.  Bitterness: Is holding on to something making you bitter and stealing your happiness? Holding onto that anger because someone has done you wrong can steal your joy. It’s hard to let that one go.

The anger we hold onto brings us comfort or so we tell ourselves. We think that our anger/bitterness is doing some good because someone is still mad about whatever the other person has said/done. I have a rude awakening for us all……It doesn’t affect the other person, just us.

By holding on to the anger we become bitter towards that person and if held long enough, that comes through in our lives. We take away our own happiness by the anger and bitterness. The other person has no clue you are still upset and furthermore they don’t care.

So, take my advice please, and move on. You are only hurting yourself on this one. Let go of the anger. Do whatever you have to, but please move on.

Holding on to anger and bitterness will drag you down and it really does steal your happiness. Who’s the winner in this case? Answer: the person you are bitter towards. Because you allowed that person who is no longer in your world, consume your world by holding on. Time to move on to bigger and better things, like being happy.

6. Dwelling on the bad: Are you holding onto all the bad stuff that has happened to you? By dwelling on the bad stuff we can’t see the good. We may blame all the bad junk that has happened to us, for the reason we are not happy. Well, my friends I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it’s not about the bad stuff that’s happened to us, it’s how we handle it now and the decisions we made because of the bad junk.I have to say from experience, dwelling on the bad gets you nowhere quick. Nothing good comes from dwelling.

Learn from the past and move on to the next good thing.

You can’t un-ring a bell. What’s past is past. Don’t dwell on the past or the things you can’t change or control. If you remove the bad stuff, you no longer have blinders on and you are able to see things in better light and see the happy once again.

I realize that I have given some tough love in this post. I know, for me, I need a good swift kick in the butt sometimes in order for me to move on and do/be better.

I love my readers and I only want the best for all of you. Please do not take offense, if this post doesn’t apply to you. I am only trying to help others the best way I know how and sometimes that means tough love. Whatever is stealing your happiness, you are the only one that has the power to get it back. Be courageous and get your happiness back.

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