Mother of Necessity

because sometimes, you just have to.

4 Steps To Help With Empty Nesting

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empty nest

Graduation ceremonies are over and graduation parties have been cleaned up. Now it is time to start planning for our kids to go off to college. Time for us parents to figure out what we are going to do when our child leaves home.

Scary thoughts come to mind. For us single mom’s our kids’ lives has made us who we are today. We have made our kids the center of our world. All the other stuff like our jobs are things we have to do in order to be with our kids.

With them leaving home, our role is changing. What are we going to do without someone to take care of? Our helper is leaving us. What are going to do without 3-10 other teenagers in our homes on any given day? The questions and fears are real.

For some of us this transition will be really tough and others, not so much.

Here are a few things that I did to prep myself when my son went away to college. He was 2 states and an hour drive away. This was a huge transition for both of us.

Be prepared. Be prepared for stillness in your home. Get yourself ready for the quiet. That was the big one for me.

Be ready for the meals for one. Get ready for less cleaning and less laundry. I didn’t realize how dirty boys are till mine left.

Be prepared for the emotions you will go through and think about your reactions to those emotions.

All of those heartfelt conversations at midnight will be over. Sad I know. But I promise the conversations you will have when they come home to visit are amazing.

There will be no more arguments over chores, playing video games and chatting on the phone to much.

Some big changes are coming. Get ready.

Being mentally prepared takes some of the pressure off when things do come up.

Relax. This is not the end of the world. This is only a new chapter in your book. Remind yourself that this is good for my child.

Relax and enjoy the quiet in your home. Enjoy not having to clean so often or do laundry every day.

Remind yourself that you did everything you needed to do to raise your child.

This is the time to enjoy the things you may have missed out on.

Time to let your child shine on their own and show us we did well.

The more relaxed you are the easier it is for you.

Do something. Don’t set in the emotions or the loneliness. Get up and do something. You have been busy for your child, now do some things for you.

Get back into that hobby that was pushed to the side since you became a mom.

Visit your friends whenever you want. Have people over to your house. It will be a nice change from teenager conversations to adult conversations.

Reinvent yourself. Do something you have always wanted to do but didn’t because you had a child at home.

Think about the positives. Think about all the great things that will happen to your child. Their journey is new and I guarantee you they still need you. It’s just in a different way now.

Think about how your journey as a parent and how it has changed you.

Think about how nice it will be to be in the bathroom with them not bugging you. Or how nice it will be not to have that dreaded question….what’s for dinner?

Going to the refrigerator and realizing that the milk container is not empty and the left-overs are still there.

It’s a positive to be in your car and not have to turn down the radio or listen to whatever yucky music they were listening to the night before.

This is a fun time for both of you. Embrace the opportunities you have. You know your child is embracing this big new world and you can do the same.

Having your home empty is not a bad thing. It’s just a new thing. Enjoy it, relax and have some fun along the way.

I hope these suggestions will help you. Let me know what you think. I would love to hear from you.

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