Mother of Necessity

because sometimes, you just have to.


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My Journey: Mom and Dad –Scary Week

hospitalLife sure does throw you some curve balls sometimes. Last Tuesday I got a phone call at 4:30 am. It was my mom telling me she fell. Hearing this woke me up very quickly. I asked if she was ok, and she begins to tell me what happened.

She woke up to go to the bathroom, once she was there mom got dizzy and fell. She hit the counter top of the sink and landed in the bathtub. She hit her back, belly and her head. I could hear that she was scared. I got dressed and drove straight over. When I arrived Mom was setting in the living room, she was white as a sheet and scared.

I called the squad. They arrived within 7 minutes. That’s pretty quick since mom and dad live about 6 miles away from the nearest town and the fire department is all volunteers. The EMT’s scooped her up and we were on our way to the hospital.

Dad and I were so concerned for her.  When a person is 70 something, has cirrhosis of the liver and is a heart patient, a fall is scary. She could have a concussion, broken bones, internal bleeding or any number of things.

The doctor and nurses checked her out thoroughly and ran a few test. Thank the good Lord she did not have any head injuries or broken bones. The ER doctor decided to keep her overnight for observation since she fell and hit her head. They wanted to make sure nothing would develop.

My sister spent the night with mom on Tuesday. Since dad had been up with mom since she fell early that morning. Overnight mom became very confused, anxious, agitated and restless. She was not resting and not acting like mom.

Boy did my sister have her hands full. Mom was so restless she did not sleep at all. Mom was more confused and very upset. My poor sister didn’t get any rest, mom was running her legs off.

In hindsight, I am so thankful the hospital doctor did not release her that day. By Wednesday things turned.

The doctors ran more test and those came back negative. We could not figure out what happed to make her so sick. It’s scary to watch your loved one suffer. You feel so helpless.

Thursday the hospital ran a couple more tests and found out that mom was dehydrated and her blood pressure would bottom out every time she stood up. This was the cause for the fall. The doctors began to make some changes to her medicines and began to hydrate mom. We were hoping to see a change. That did not come on Thursday. Mom hadn’t slept in almost 48 hours and she was still very confused and just not a happy camper.

Thursday Dad spent the night with mom. Another sleepless night for both of them. Mom was still confused and not happy. My Dad worried all night and did everything he could to help her but mom wouldn’t have any of it. It didn’t matter what any of us did she was not going to rest.

Friday was more of the same. But she was beginning to sleep a little. I do mean a little. She slept for a couple of hours but during her sleep she was very fidgety. She would pick at her blanket, move her pillows, roll from side to side and mumble.

Throughout the week mom would share her dislike by giving us the evil eye as Dad calls it. If looks could kill, my sister would be dead at this time. Mom would curl up her lip at a nurse she didn’t care for or roll her eyes as a doctor would leave the room. Mom may have been very confused but she sure could communicate what or who she didn’t like.

I spent the night Friday with Mom. I got to see firsthand what my Dad and sister were contending with. I found out quickly I was one of those people she didn’t like. I got the evil eye and mom informed a nurse that I was the meanest kid she had.

I know my Mom loves me and this did not offend me. She didn’t know what she was saying, she was just communicating her dislike about the situation and I happened to be there.

Friday night was another sleepless night for both of us. Mom didn’t rest at all. She was constantly fidgeting with things, throwing her blankets and pillows to the floor, playing with the bed rails, mumbling about things and people that weren’t there.

What a scary thing to watch. Seeing your mom is such a state and you are completely helpless. That messes with your head.

Saturday was more of the same but Mom did sleep a little bit. Still restless but sleeping.

My sister spent the night Saturday. Things were a little better. Mom slept for an hour and a half during the night. Mom was still running our legs off and sharing her dislikes.

Sunday was different story. By 8:30 am Mom was sleeping soundly, no fidgeting and no mumbling, she was snoring. As my sister said, I never thought the sound of snoring would be so peaceful.

It was a good day. Mom slept most of the day and when she was awake, she was no longer confused or agitated. She finally ate more than 4 bites for dinner. It was so nice to see my mom and not the ‘sick’ mom.

Mom slept all night Sunday and almost completely back to her normal self.

Mom will go to physical therapy to help her gain strength and learn how to use some helpful tools to get mobility so she can come home. She is on her way to recovering from this scary ordeal.

I have to thank all the nurses, doctors and technicians for all their hard work in getting my mom feeling better.

Thank you to those who are praying for mom and our family.

Thank you to my readers for your understanding and patience as I juggle the new job, my family and trying to write blogs.


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My Journey: Mom & Dad-Sharing The News

newsThis past week was a little better for me. The week before had me on a nasty emotional roller coaster ride. I would get up in the morning, get ready for work and everything was fine. After being at work for an hour or 2, thoughts would overwhelm me and I would be weeping at my desk. The next day seemed to go fine but on my drive home I would be in tears again. It was like this the whole week. I was exhausted.

So many thoughts and emotions go through my head, I can’t help but cry. Which leads me to this blog.

I was asked by mom to inform the family that she was in stage 4 Cirrhosis of the liver. I was glad to take that burden off her shoulders. She didn’t need the stress of telling the same diagnosis to 30-40 family members.

Mom also asked me to inform their friends that she and Dad have known for 60 plus years.

For the family I knew it would be too hard even for me to make those phone calls. I decided that I would send one email to everyone.  I know it’s not very personable but I just couldn’t go through those emotions at that time. That was a tough email to write. I am just an amateur blogger. Sometimes words do NOT come easy for me. That email put me to the test.

I was able to conjure up words that made sense and inform almost all the first cousins. (Sad to say that I was only informing cousins because out of the 14 brothers and sister mom has there are only 2 brothers left. Mom informed them of her news). I received many phone calls and emails letting us know that they are thinking and praying for our family.

Within hours of sending the email, I was full of love and support from so many responding. Many telling me that if I needed anything that they would be there for me. That gave me great peace of mind knowing there are so many that are willing to be there for me (mom/dad).  So many shared their love and concerns. So many were heartbroken for Mom and our family.

Shortly after I sent the email, I decided to call Mom and Dad’s friends. These are folks I have known all my life. People that went to school with my parents. A long line of history is there.

Our families would get together and all of us kids would play while the parents would play card games eat, and have a great time. I have so many memories with these families.

My sister and I even had a couple of these ladies helping in our school.  These ladies watched us grow up and helped us become the people we are today. Thank you.

I knew that call was going to difficult. The first call I made was to Mrs. B. I didn’t beat around the bush I just blurted it out……”Mom is in stage 4”. I know I took her by surprise but she was great. Mrs. B helped me. She was saddened by the news but she was very uplifting to me. She took the burden off my shoulders and informed the other friends in the group about mom.

What a blessing. Thank you Mrs. B for lightening my load. Thank you for being so kind and supportive. Thank you for informing others and carrying that load for me.

Once I got off the phone, I was on overload with emotions. The emotions of having to inform so many of such awful news. Worrying how this news would affect them. Saddened by the sorrow so many were feeling that night. Realizing that I had just upset some households, I was beside myself.  My dealing with my own emotions on the severity of this reality.

It’s hard for me to put into words the range of emotions I am going through daily. I am hoping, someday I will be able to vocalize those emotions into written form. But for now, I will stumble through the blogs and my emotions.

Thank you to my readers for your loving and supportive comments, likes and shares. You are fantastic!!!! I know the last few posts have not been the most positive in nature (I’m working on that), Thank you for your understanding.

Just a reminder to myself. I may be a raw emotional wreck, but I have people that love me and want to help. Remember to reflect at the end of the day and look for the little things that made you smile or better yet lightened your load. There are blessings out there, sometimes you have to search for them. Take the time, it will always be worth the look.


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Are You Ready For Winter?

My answer….never. I do love the change of the seasons but my least favorite is winter.

When I got up this morning there was a heavy frost outside. It was beautiful but cold. I don’t enjoy the cold. I took a walk and snagged a photo hoping it would change my outlook. It didn’t….still don’t like the cold or winter even though it is pretty.

Photo by: Mother of Necessity

Photo by: Mother of Necessity

There is a four letter word that I swear is a cuss word and I cringe every time I hear it……..SNOW.

I am never mentally prepared for winter. I’m probably going to jinx Ohio for saying this, but I am grateful that it is December and we have yet to see that white fluffy stuff falling from the sky. Grateful that it hasn’t been so cold yet that I haven’t broken out the winter garb.

It’s coming, I know it is, so I might as well get prepared for the inevitable.

Here are a few things that I do to get prepared for that dreaded yucky winter.

  1. Make sure I have hat’s gloves and boots.
  2. Dig the snow shovel out and inspect it, so I know it will work.
  3. Buy a few bags of salt for my sidewalk and path to my car.
  4. Put a bag of salt in the trunk of car. I can always use it in an emergency. I can use it when it’s icy in any parking lot. I can use the unopened bag under a tire if I get stuck and it’s added weight to the car to help with traction.
  5. Keep an extra pair of gloves, hat, a pair of socks, jacket, a blanket, bottled water and a few snacks in the car in case I get stranded.
  6. I never let my car get below a quarter tank of gas. I want to make sure I have gas to stay warm if I get stranded or if I get stuck in traffic.
  7. I put plastic on my windows of my home to keep the warmth in. It saves on my fuel bill too.
  8. Kerosene heater with 5 gallons of fuel. Just in case the electricity goes out. This will keep a couple rooms warm, it will prevent my pipes from freezing and it’s another way to cook food if there is no electricity.
  9. Stock up on canned goods, bread, snacks and water. If I’m not able to leave the house I want to make sure I have something to eat while I am waiting for the snow to stop falling.
  10. Get my car inspected and fix whatever problem there is. I have the oil changed, and get new wipers. I want my car to be extra safe in the winter. I am too old to be setting in a broken car waiting for a tow truck.
  11. I keep lip balm and lotion in my purse. The winter does a number on this old menopausal skin.
  12. I get an extra box of tissues and stock up on cold/sinus medication. It never fails, I always get the flu, a bad cold or have a sinus infection this time of year.
  13. I open my blinds during the day to let the sun help heat my home. It saves on fuel and can brighten you mood too.
  14. Last:  I pray that this winter is mild and I don’t have to use any of the above items.

I hope this winter passes without incident for all of you.

What do you do to be prepared for the yucky winter months?


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My 2 Bad Vices

This post is a scary one for me. I am really stepping out of my comfort zone on this one.

For my readers that do not know me this will be a surprise.

My first vice that I have is smoking. Yep, that’s right I smoke. I have for a long time.cigerette

I started as a teenager and smoked when I would go out with friends.  I thought I was cool. I smoked off and on till I met the ex. From there I smoked every day.

I gave it up when I was pregnant, picked it back up as soon as we came home from the hospital.

I quit for 6 years. But when my ex asked for a divorce I picked up a cigarette instead of going off on him. I have been smoking ever since that day.

I know, this vice can kill me. I know all the horrible things it does to my body. I know it’s not good for me, at all. I know firsthand, from relatives that have passed how bad it is. But here I am typing this blog with a cigarette in my hand.

I have tried several times to stop smoking but I can’t seem to kick this awful habit. I have tried prescribed medicines several times.

One didn’t do a thing for me, the next one made me hungry all the time and left a horrible tastes in my mouth and I couldn’t sleep. I stopped taking it because of the side effects and it really didn’t help.

The last one was the worst. It was beginning to work and I had stopped for 2 weeks but had to continue with the prescription. The pill worked but when I slept I had nightmares. I can deal with a nightmare or two. But these were awful.

They involved family members and their deaths. I had dreams of being in a tornado while in a car and watching my home town get demolished then it was my turn in the car.  The nightmares always included family and myself.

These nightmares were so vivid.  I would wake being out of breath, sweating or yelling. HORRIBLE!!!! I just couldn’t do it anymore.

So here I am slowly killing myself with what my son calls cancer sticks. Sad part is, I enjoy smoking. I like the taste, I enjoy all the rituals that go into smoking. Like the crack of a Zippo lighter.

When I did quit for 6 years, I did this cold turkey. It was tough but I did it. The only reason I quit was for my son. I was a stay at home mom and I didn’t want him to pick-up on this awful habit. Good news: He hasn’t and says he never will.

I’m sure one day I will quit but for now…..nope.

over eatingMy second vice is food. I have always had a love hate relationship with food. I love to eat and food hates me.  Because of the relationship with food, I am obese. I hate that word “obese”.  I think I would rather be called fat, heavy or overweight. Overweight is probably an understatement.

The truth of the matter is, I am a big girl. Have been for almost 28 years. I wasn’t always ‘fat’. But I had always carried a little extra weight.  Even as a teenager I wasn’t skinny. I was athletic, a tomboy and was a little overweight. But I still looked good. Or so I thought.

I started gaining weight when I got married. That should have been my first sign that the ex was not the man for me. But I was young and stupid and food became my outlet, comfort and therapy. (WOW! A therapeutic moment. I have never said that out loud.)

I have lost weight off and on but nothing substantial over the years. Almost 10 years ago was a big moment for me.

My son was 13-14 and he was ashamed of me because of my weight. He didn’t want me to go to school functions or meet his friends. Sad, really, because I am the only parent he has and I was making it harder for him to be proud of me.

So I decided it was time to do something about my weight. I went on-line and signed up for Weight-Watchers. I have to say it worked. For 2 years I thought of nothing but food and exercise.

Everything else was second, including my son, family and job. I seriously mean every thought was about me losing weight. It consumed me.

I did this for 2 years and lost half my body weight. I know, sounds awesome and amazing. It kind of was.

I wrote my story to Weight Watchers and they flew me and a friend to New York for a professional photo shoot. It was for a long weekend. They put us in a nice hotel. I had my hair and make-up done by professionals. That was fun. The shoot lasted a few hours and the rest of the weekend was sight-seeing.

I had never been to New York. I have say that was one of the best vacation I had ever had. It was so much fun. We did most of the typical things, like visit the Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building, SoHo, Financial district. Ate at some amazing places. Had the best cheese burger, ever. Had a pretzel from a street vendor. We saw a show on Broadway. We had the scariest cab ride ever.  I had never flirted with so many good looking men in my life.  It was a great time.

Weight Watchers decided they were not going to use my story to feature. That was a big letdown, but they still paid for everything and I had the best time.

The down side to losing the weight was, I was sick. I was losing my hair, I had dizzy spells, I was on medication for the first time in my life. I may have looked good to the world but I felt awful.

When I came home from New York, some things happened in my little family that was not in my control, and as you already know, I am a control freak.

Within weeks things fell apart for me.  We had to pack up our apartment and move. We moved in with my folks. My job was changing. My little world was spinning way to fast.

Because of all these things/events happening so quickly I had to put Weight Watchers on the back burner. To be honest, I threw it out the window. I didn’t and couldn’t focus on myself.  Others came first. So I began to put the weight back on.

I didn’t even notice at first. But within a year I was right back where I started.

Ever since those awful months, I have not dieted. I enjoy my food. This is my vice and I know how to use it….all the time. My focus is family. I am second.

I know what you are thinking, Wow, she is a mess. She should put herself first, especially since those awful times are behind her. You are probably right.

But here I am. Again, maybe someday that will happen. For now, you have to accept me for my faults, flaws, scars and weight.

Can you be brave and tell me what your vices are?


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8 Surprising Things About Menopause

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Here’s a topic no woman wants to talk about because it makes us feel, well, less than. We should not be embarrassed of what we go through. I’m not saying shout it from the roof tops, but at least talk about it with your friends, mom and aunts.

This ugly ride called Menopause does not mean we are to suffer in silence. I have been going through Menopause for 7 years now. I’m tired of the silence and the embarrassment.

Just because we are going through a very natural process of life does not mean we are no longer women. It just means our reproduction journey is ending. We are not less of a woman because we can no longer conceive. We are strong, independent, and feisty and more of a woman because of this journey called Menopause.

I have asked some of my friends and family about this topic and here are some things that either have surprised us because we had no clue or things we did expect but not to the extent we are going through.

HAIR: OMGoodness!!!! I knew my hair would change but never dreamed I would lose my natural curl or that I would have hair loss. There’s not a day that goes by that I have to clean out my hair brush just to brush my hair. And geesh….washing my hair is like I put Nair in the shampoo bottle.

Becoming grey was a surprise to some that I talked to. I was already going grey but now it’s getting greyer every day.

The one thing that surprised us all was how dull our hair was. Most of the women I talked to have dark hair that shined. Now it’s dull and the texture is different. No one told us about that. Sure would have been nice to have a warning shot.

SKIN: We knew our skin would change but we had no idea how bad and how fast. We knew wrinkles would come but didn’t realize the elasticity would go so fast. One day you are putting on lotion and realize that your skin just soaked it up like you didn’t do anything. My skin looks like a baby alligator, especially on my arms. Weird.

Your skin is no longer smooth and tight. Now it’s rough and just hangs there. Yuck! We thought it was bad in our thirties when the boobs and butt began to fall. Just wait, the rest of the body follows.

You notice that ‘brown’ spot on your face, hand or arm and you go wash it off thinking its dirt. Realizing that it’s not going away, you say to yourself, Well crap. I am too young to have an age spot already. This kind of stuff plays mind games with you.

SLEEP: This is a tough one. Your sleep changes. Usually it will be the lack of sleep you get. I’m not sure if this is because of hot flashes or what. For me, sleep has always been an issue but the first 4-5 years of menopause it was bad. I would go a week and only have about 10-12 of sleep. I would sleep for 2 hours and my body was: ok…time to do something. I was not expecting sleep to be an issue. Especially because I didn’t have night sweats like most woman.

Some of the women said they would wake every couple of hours every night. So be prepared for this one. You will have less energy because you can’t sleep.

HOT/COLD FLASHES: This is something almost every woman goes through and it’s not a surprise. What is a surprise is how bad they really are.

It can be 10 degrees outside with snow on the ground and out of the blue you are hit with a wall of heat from the inside. You are so hot you begin to sweat. You feel beads of sweat run down your back, your hair line gets wet and it feels like you are in a microwave getting cooked from the inside. All the while you’re at work, can’t shed any clothes to get an inch of relief. It’s a miserable feeling.

There’s not a fan big enough to ease these hot flashes. I think it should be mandatory that every work place and home has a walk-in freezer just for us women that need to find some relief from these hot flashes.

Most woman have night sweats. Meaning, that when they go to bed and fall asleep within hours they are in a pool of sweat. The sheets are soaked, the pajamas are soaked and can’t get cool. Now they have to get up (wake the spouse) change the sheets, take a cool shower and put on another set of pajamas.

This happens for most several times a week and can last for months. Talk about no sleep. YUCK!!!

I didn’t know that you could have cold flashes, well not really flashes. For me I went about 8 months freezing to death. I could not get warm for the life of me. I would sleep on flannel sheets, wear sweat pants, 2 pairs of socks, a t-shirt, a sweat shirt and 4 blankets and I was still cold. I wore jeans the whole summer and kept a sweat shirt in my car. This was not a fun time.

Being hot/cold to the extreme does things to the mind. You think you are going crazy. There’s nothing that seems to curb these extremes.

Be prepared as much as you can. Wear layers at work. This way you can peel off a layer to try and get cool. Drink cold drinks and plenty of water. The sweats can dehydrate you. Keep a sweater in the office or car.

MOOD SWINGS: These are a given. We all know menopause comes with mood swings. Here’s where the surprise is. They can happen at any time. No warning, you just snap. There’s no escaping them. It’s as if we are possessed for a moment.

It’s like you have lost your mind for 30 minutes. Then you realize at the end of the day that you tore off some kids head all because he handed you the bag of groceries instead of putting them in your cart.

The good part is the mood swings are short lived. You don’t stay in that ‘crazy mode’ for long. They pass like a hot flash.

Some of the woman have said that the mood swings made them feel like a teenage drama queen.  Crying or Raging….no in between. Or that their emotions were on an emotional roller coaster ride.

There’s really no prepping for mood swings. Just be prepared to apologize, a lot.

CYCLES: I know this is not a topic ANYONE wants to know about. Don’t forget, we should not be embarrassed of what is happening to us. This is all natural and every woman has to go through it at some point. I will do my best not to get too graphic (sorry guys).

Ok, we all know our cycles change during menopause. They can become heavy at times. Cause us pain we had never had before. They can be infrequent or almost all the time.

Here’s something that some of us didn’t know. During a cycle there can be clots. This is normal. What’s scary is the size of the clots and how long clotting can last. There’s no planning for these, but I can suggest that if you are clotting for more than 10 days…..go to your OBGYN. There are things they can do to help.

Most of the women I talked with had this issue with clotting. I had to have a DNC to help with mine.

Always keep supplies in your purse, extra’s in your car. Always have your house stocked. And See your OBGYN if you are having massive pain or clotting.

That wasn’t so bad was it?

MUSCLE MASS/WEIGHT GAIN:   Menopause does awful things to our bodies. Most women gain weight while going through menopause. But we kind of knew that already.

What did surprise me was my strength, it’s not as good as it used to be. Muscle mass seems to diminish a little bit. Just keep working out to keep as much muscle as you can.

FORGETFULNESS: This one is pretty bad. All of the women I talked to are very active and productive women. They have families, kids, jobs, just like all women. They all said the same thing about forgetfulness…..it was the worst thing.

Some said they walked around in a fog and it affected their work. Some sought out help with doctors because it was so bad for them. Others started making lists and writing down everything they had to do.

The forgetfulness does not seem to go away, it’s just something we learn to work with.

The simple things like, remembering where you put your purse becomes a big deal. Walking into a room and forgetting why you are there will become common.

You will learn to re-train your brain to help you remember things. You will put into place routines to help you remember. You will learn to always leave things in one place, this way you don’t have to search for them.

I am a pretty organized person. Everything in my house has a place or home. But since menopause, I can’t find the scissors that are laying in front of me.

Since we have to go through this yucky ride called Menopause, we might as well keep our sense of humor and share our journey with others. I know, for me, talking about this ride is helpful. I am not alone and neither are you.

Don’t be embarrassed because you are in the swings of menopause. It’s time to celebrate. Another chapter in our book is almost done. We still love babies but grateful now these babies go back to our kids homes. We are still women. Still wives and mothers. We will never be “less than”. We are more amazing, feistier than ever, independent, loving, caring creatures and nothing, not even menopause can take that away from us.

One journey is ending and another is waiting. It’s time to celebrate growing older and embrace what trials we go through….together.

If you are going through menopause, tell me what things have surprised you.


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Making A Mountain Out Of A Mole-Hill

Mountain

I think this is my son’s favorite past-time. I realize he is still young and can freak out about things he encounters for the first time. But, really to stay in that freak-out mode and to build on it, just seems tiresome to me.

Let me set the stage. A few months ago my son had to replace the engine in his car. He had many choices to pick from but he decided to replace the engine. In this situation he did not freak out at all. (I did for a few minutes).

A few days ago, his car wouldn’t start. He checked everything and he could not find the issue. He comes in the house and is just deflated, his attitude is bad and he’s talking about how his savings will be gone once he gets the car fixed.

He continues to rant about how this, that and the other won’t work out. He just kept building layer after layer of how bad all this is, without even knowing what is wrong with the car or how much it will cost to fix.

He stayed in this phase/mode/mindset for over a day. Never taking any action to resolve the car issue.

As some of you know, once your kid reaches a certain age, we as parents can’t tell them anything. So, I didn’t say a word till he asked me.

That’s when I asked if he called our mechanic, he said “no”.

Here I go being a mom and telling my adult kid what to do. I tell him to get on the phone and make sure the mechanic can take care of the car within a couple of days. And then tell him to call for a tow truck to take the car to the mechanic.

He comes back to me and says the car will be picked up the next day and the mechanic will be ready for the car. Awesome….wheels in motion (pun intended).

The next day everything is done and within a few hours the mechanic calls my son to tell him it was nothing major just a faulty spark plug and he can pick up the car anytime.

Best part, not a lot of money out of my son’s savings.

He drove himself crazy for 2 days all because he made things worse then they were and expected the worst thing to happen. And it wasn’t that way at all.

My brother likes to say this kind of action is ‘going from zero to hammered’. I call it, making a mountain out of a mole hill.

We all do this to ourselves at some point. For me, I’m ok with being in that stage for a minute or two. But to stay in that stage for a day or longer is just ridiculous.

Nothing gets accomplished and your stress level goes through the roof. Then fear sets in because we are afraid of the outcome. All because we went on a tangent to make things worse for ourselves.

Lessons learned:

We make thigs out to be worse than they really are.

Nothing is as a bad as it seems (most of the time)

Don’t let a problem sit and boil, get busy and resolve issue (ASAP)

Take a breath when a problem comes up and then tackle said problem.

I hope my son’s example of what not to do is helpful for you.

Tell me a time when you made a mountain out of a mole hill and how you resolved the problem or what you had learned.


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Did Your Get Up And Go, Got Up And Went

MultitaskingHave you ever been looking forward to something and when that day came, you just didn’t want to anymore? Or have you been in the ‘zone’ and working hard and all of a sudden your ‘zone’ was gone?

This happens to me all the time.

In my family we say “Get up and go” which means it’s time to do something, time for work, chores, anything. For instance if I know my son has a list of things to do, I will gently remind him by saying….Don’t you think it’s time to get up and go. That’s his queue.

Now, my mom will say this to my dad and my dad’s response (just to bug mom) is: My get up and go, got up and went. Which means, he really doesn’t want to or he’s just bugging mom.

Seriously though, have you ever had the energy to do something, go someplace or be in the middle of a task and out of the blue, you just don’t feel like it anymore or you lost your momentum? It’s not that you are tired, you just no longer have the energy to follow through. What is up with that?POOF- Gone

This confuses me every time. I had the energy 10 minutes ago, where did that energy go? It got up and went. I‘ve been trying to figure out why this happens to me. Am I missing something, Do I have ADD, or am I just lazy?

I may have ADD, I do like a shiny object and I do get side tracked on occasion. I can be lazy too. But when I am in the middle of something or have committed myself to a task or friends I will follow through. This one has me befuddled.

I have been practicing a few tricks to help myself with this anomaly.

The first thing I do is try to figure out why I no longer want to do the thing I was looking forward to. I ask myself these questions.

Am I board with said project?

Do I really NEED to do this right now?

Do I really want to go to…..?

Will this impact my day, week, friend or family?

Should I do it anyway?

Once I have answered these questions, I generally have my answer to what I will do next.

If I see that I really don’t have a need for or it won’t impact anyone, then I will either drop it or move on, or some sort of guilt will rear its ugly head and I will do it anyway.

If my answers are, I need to, I have to, and it’s the right thing to do then I will force myself to do/go. I generally feel good about my decision to go through with it.

I have found out that even when I don’t want to and I do/go anyway. I have great time and I get so much accomplished.

It works out in the end. But I still haven’t figured out why I lost the gumption in the first place.

I can’t be alone in this. Well, maybe I am the odd ball after all.

If you have any ideas on why I/we do this to ourselves, please share with me. I really want to know. This is one thing that drives me nuts sometimes.

Share your thoughts to help a girl out. Thanks