Mother of Necessity

because sometimes, you just have to.


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My Journey: Mom and Dad-Getting Organized

ducks in a rowWhen a family is going through the tragedy of preparing for the final stages before the passing of a loved one, you tend to be overwhelmed and consumed with more important things. Being organized is the last thing you are thinking about.

The past few weeks have been chaotic to say the least for me. Just for my own sanity, I need to get organized. I NEED to have that sense of being in control of something, well anything. Getting my ducks in a row helps me do that.

Here are some things I am currently working on.

This past week I have gathered photos of mom, her family, Dad, us kids and the grandbabies to make a photo slideshow at Mom’s viewing (when the time comes). I have scanned all photos into my computer and have edited each one to make them better.

This was a hard task to do. But also very enjoyable. I got the chance to talk to mom about each photo, listen to stories I’ve never heard before. The best part was, it was like I was seeing these photos for the first time. Looking at them with new eyes. I never realized how pretty my mom is. She and my dad made the cutest couple. The biggest surprise was, I didn’t realize how much my sister looks like mom.

Now the only thing left for the slideshow is picking out a few songs to play while the video is scrolling through. Another tough challenge but I am up for that one. It should be fun listening to some beautiful piano music. Mom just loves a great pianist.

The other thing I am working on is a guest book (so to speak) for Mom/Dad’s house. Since all of kids work, we miss out on visitors to their house during the day. It’s nice for us to know they are not alone.

I was also thinking this is a great way to remember to thank the ones that have stopped by, brought food, helped out with chores or just volunteered to set with Mom while Dad ran some errands.

Not only that, if I don’t send Thank You cards out or miss someone, Mom would be disappointed with me. Mom is very proper when it comes to these sort of things. She always sent out hand written thank you notes within a week. I have some big shoes to fill.

I figured a guest book for their house would be a great easy way for me to stay up on all the visitors. This way the guests can sign in, let us know if they brought food, visited or helped in anyway. And I can be sure to thank them properly.

This weekend I will be bringing a notebook and pen to keep at their house so we can take notes on any arrangements that need to be made, write down songs she would like to have played, jot down anything we deem important or would like to remember and leave notes for the siblings.

I know all of this seems trivial in the grand scheme of things. I will be honest, I thought it was kind of odd too. But I’m here to tell you, it helps. I am not searching my home or purse for that one little piece of paper that had a note on it that mom wanted me to remember.

I will not be rushing around the last minute trying to go through photos (that will tear me apart) to make a slideshow. I know for a fact how hard it is to look through photos just after a death. I have helped a couple of cousins with this. 

I won’t have to worry if I missed someone for Thank You cards. I will have my list. And you all know how much I love lists.

This is just the beginning stages. There will be more challenges ahead. But for this week. I feel like I am on my game. I’m probably not but I do love the sense of control I have with these steps I have taken this week.

I hope in the weeks/months to come I can stay on top of all the balls in the air. Only time will tell. For now this is good thing.

If you have any helpful tips I would love to hear them. I can use any help I can get.

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My Journey: Job Searching-Waiting

waitingI am not a patient person. This past year I have been working on this issue but it seems the harder I try to be patient the more stress I go through. I guess I’m going about this wrong.

This journey for the past couple of months has taken its toll on me with all the waiting I have done.

Waiting on myself to be prepared to look for a job.

Waiting on a great website to start my job search.

Waiting on the mail to send my resumes.

Waiting on someone to get back with me to tell me I have been declined for the position.

Waiting on the results of an assessment that took 2 hours to complete.

Waiting on e-mails to tell me I have a phone interview.

Waiting for those calls to come in.

Waiting on the next call or e-mail to invite me for an interview.

Waiting in the lobby for that interview.

Waiting for the next phone call or e-mail to share some good news. (I hope)

Waiting on myself not go insane with all this waiting.

Waiting to start a new job.

You would think that I would be an expert by now from all the waiting. I’m not. I’m more anxious than ever.

I think I’m ready for a new start, new opportunities, and new work life. I have enjoyed my time off from work and have learned so much about myself, but money is in the driver’s seat right now.

My journey right now is once again learning to be patient and wait for things to come. I just hope I am not in a rubber room, rocking back and forth before I get that call saying, ”Congratulations, you are now a new employee at XYZ Company”.  Time will tell.

I know this journey that I am on is teaching more lessons than I thought and that well and good. We all can always use more education. I am failing in this class called “Waiting”. It is kicking my butt.

I know the rules and have read the syllabus. I have practiced my skills every day and yet here I sit waiting on the next thing and it’s driving me crazy.
I am a work in progress and hopefully by the end of this journey I will be more patient than when I started.